10.3 Social and Emotional Connections to Behavior
Ardene Niemer, M.Ed.
As children grow and learn to be in the world, they learn the skills needed to take turns, help their friends, play together, and cooperate with others. Generally, around the same time, children are learning about their own feelings and emotions (Bovey & Strain, 2005).
Children are born with the need and desire to connect with those around them through (social development). When teachers and care providers work to build strong, positive relationships with children from birth through the early years, and value their diverse cultures and languages, children are more likely to feel safe and secure. This, in turn, helps to lay a strong foundation for healthy social and emotional development.
This process has anaffect on how children experience the world, express themselves, manage their emotions, and establish positive relationships with the (emotional development) of others. Emotional awareness is the ability to recognize and identify our own feelings and actions along with the feelings and actions of other people and understand how our own feelings and actions affect ourselves and others (Twombly et.al., 2018).
The following Venn diagram illustrates the independence and overlap of social development and emotional development; although they are often referred to as a single developmental domain (Head Start ECLKC, 2021a), it is essential to understand the difference between the two areas:
Table 10.1 provides some examples of social and emotional milestones as they relate to behavior: Please refer to the milestones shared at CDC, UNICEF, March of Dimes, Head Start ECLKC, or other research-based milestone documents for more detailed information.
| Age | Examples of social and emotional milestones |
|---|---|
| Birth to 2 months | May briefly calm himself (may bring hands to mouth and suck on hand). Tries to make eye contact with caregiver. Begins to smile at people. |
| 6 months | Reacts positively to familiar faces and begins to be wary of strangers. Likes to play with others, especially parents and other caregivers. Responds to own name. |
| 9 months | May show early signs of separation anxiety and may cry more often when separated from caregivers and be clingy with familiar adults. May become attached to specific toys or other comfort items. Child understands “no.” Copies sounds and gestures of others. |
| 12 months | May show fear in new situations. Repeats sounds or actions to get attention. May show signs of independence and resist a caregiver’s attempt to help. Begins to follow simple directions. |
| 18 months | May need help coping with temper tantrums. May begin to explore alone but with parent close by. Engages in simple pretend or modeling behavior, such as feeding a doll or talking on the phone. Demonstrates joint attention; for example, the child points to an airplane in the sky and looks at caregiver to make sure the caregiver sees it too. |
| 2 years | Copies others, especially adults and older children. Shows more and more independence and may show defiant behavior. Mainly plays alongside other children (parallel play) but is beginning to include other children in play. Follows simple instructions. |
| 3 years | May start to understand the idea of “mine” and “his” or “hers.” May feel uneasy or anxious with major changes in routine. May begin to learn how to take turns in games and follows directions with two or three steps. Names a friend and may show concern for a friend who is sad or upset. |
| Age | Examples of social and emotional milestones |
| 4 years | Cooperates with other children and may prefer to play with other children than by herself. Often cannot tell what is real and what is make-believe. Enjoys new things and activities. |
| 5 years | May want to please caregivers and peers. Is aware of gender. May start recognizing what is real and what is make-believe. |
| 6-7 years | Measure his performance against others. Continue to develop her social skills by playing with other children in a variety of situations. Be able to communicate with others without adult help. Start to feel sensitive about how other children feel about him. |
Social development and emotional development include development in skills related to social interaction, emotional awareness, and self-regulation. Following are some important reminders as you consider social and emotional development for young children.
Social interaction is focused on the relationships we share with others. In our work with young children it is important to remember that this includes the child’s relationships with adults as well as peers. As children develop socially, they learn to take turns, help their friends, play together, share, and cooperate with others.
Emotional awareness includes the ability to recognize and understand our own feelings and emotions. It is important to learn to recognize our own actions and reactions as well as those of other people. Our own feelings and actions can directly affect not only ourselves, but others as well.
Self-regulation is defined as the ability to express thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in socially appropriate ways. Learning to calm down when angry or excited and persisting at difficult tasks are examples of self-regulation.
Children who are socially and emotionally healthy tend to demonstrate, and continue to develop, several important behaviors and skills (Blimes, 2012; McClellan & Katz, 2001). According to Blimes, McClellan and Katz, socially and emotionally healthy children:
- are usually in a positive mood
- listen and follow directions
- have close relationships with caregivers and peers
- recognize, label, and manage their own emotions
- understand others’ emotions and show empathy
- express wishes and preferences clearly
- gain access to ongoing play and group activities
- show an ability to play, negotiate, and compromise with others
Social and emotional development are both related to behavior and include the areas of social interaction, emotional awareness, and self-regulation. Social interaction spotlights the relationships children share with others and includes relationships with adults and other children. As children develop socially, they learn the skills needed to take turns, help their classmates, play together, and cooperate with others.
Remember, social and emotional development are both related to behavior and include the areas of social interaction, emotional awareness, andself-regulation. Social interaction spotlights the relationships children share with others and includes relationships with adults and other children. As children develop socially, they learn the skills needed to take turns, help their classmates, play together, and cooperate with others.
Reflection
- Define social development in your own words.
- Now define emotional development.
- How are they each different, and where do they overlap?
Create this reflection in a Venn Diagram.
Attributions
- Figure 10.4: kindergarten_abb3 by Illustrator LdreiT is released under CC BY-SA 2.0
- Figure 10.5: Author-created Venn Diagram Showing Social and Emotional Development by Ardene Niemer, for WA Open ProfTech, © SBCTC, CC BY 4.0
- Figure 10.6: Venn Diagram by Ardene Niemer, for WA Open ProfTech, © SBCTC, CC BY 4.0
The process where a child learns to interact with others around them
The child’s development of and identification of emotions and feelings, and includes the child’s experience, expression, and management of their emotions.
What we can observe as a visual demonstration of the child’s own feelings and empathy for others.
A child’s ability to understand and manage their behavior.