Connecting with Families to Create a Sense of Community

The connection between a child’s home and early learning program is an important connection for the growth and well-being of the child. In a quality program, the family and program would function as a partnership, sharing and planning together. This requires the family to be fully engaged with the program.

In a high-quality early learning program, connecting with families in a meaningful way involves a cooperative and asset-based approach where early childhood professionals, families, and children work together to establish positive and purposeful connections. It is a partnership between both families and the program staff which requires the recognition and appreciation of each other’s roles and abilities. Family engagement emphasizes the development of culturally and linguistically responsive relationships with significant family members in a child’s existence.

Building Community

To build community with families, and function in effective and meaningful ways, we must be able to communicate effectively and inclusively (Epstein et al., 2002). Inclusive communication refers to an approach aimed at establishing communication using all available means to understand and to be understood. We need to broaden the options for communication so that we can be sure that the family receives and understands our messages and that we receive and understand what they want us to know about them or their child. To be inclusive, we need to be aware of the challenges to communication that children or their families face. There are families who speak languages other than English and who have hearing, vision, or reading challenges or disabilities. Some families may not have access to a car to come to school, and some families may not have a computer or internet account to send and receive email. Effective and inclusive educators also understand that there is diversity in culture and language use as well. People communicate differently, and a variety of strategies may be needed to help smooth communication.

Some general examples of thoughtful strategies for inclusive communication to use with families include:

• Ask families how they would like to receive information from you- whether it is best to email, call, text, or meet in person.
• Ask what time of day is best and try to connect at that time.
• Be flexible! If one communication method does not work, try another.
• Be patient and allow time to respond or react. Try counting silently to allow for processing, finishing a sentence, or answering your question.
• Engage as many senses as appropriate—hearing, sight, and touch.
• Limit background noise and music.
• Look and speak directly to the child or parent. Face the person and do not cover your face so that they can read the cues on your face or read your lips.
• Make sure only one person is speaking at a time- do not talk over another.
• Speak slowly and clearly with shorter sentences, but do not talk down to the child or parent.
• Use visual supports (picture schedules, photos of daily routines, social stories) gestures, and body language along with words.
• Use interpreters if a family is not comfortable speaking the same language as the teacher. (Do not put a child in the position of translating, but ask for a family member, friend, or community resource to translate the information.)

To build an effective community, it is essential that we focus on equity. Equity is the extermination of privilege, oppression, inequalities, and disadvantage through fair and impartial treatment. Equity is not equal or one-size-fits-all. Equity is working with each child and family to individualize and differentiate strengths and areas for growth to create a plan that gives each what is needed to grow and thrive (NAEYC, 2019) . In this intentional and meaningful engagement, equity-based opportunities can also serve to help family members to be effective advocates for their child(ren). In considering equity in your approach, remember translation, interpretation, working with cultural groups as partners, and recognizing the importance of building (and even rebuilding) trust with families who face discrimination and bias. For family engagement to be meaningful, it must be equitable.

Family-teacher conferences and family events are common strategies for partnering with families in classrooms and programs. We need to remember that the main and essential factor in family engagement is to build strong, positive, and effective relationships with families that can help children and families thrive. Family-teacher conferences also support the first NAEYC principle of family engagement: “Programs invite families to participate in decision making and goal setting for their child” (NAEYC, n.d., para. 4). These planned and intentional times to meet are opportunities to share information about the child’s experiences, development, and learning. It is also the time to plan what can be done at home and at school to support the child’s continuing progress.

Consider these things when planning and preparing for conferences and events:

• Accommodate different languages.
• Discuss different experiences.
• Learn about and consider cultural norms.
• Plan for varied schedules.
• Share different kinds of information.
• Let the family speak. They come to us with knowledge about their child and family.

Family Involvement vs. Family Engagement

Take another look at the definitions for family involvement and family engagement, and notice how they are the same and how they are different:

Family involvement is parent participation in educational systems and learning activities that foster a child’s well-being. It involves conscious and intentional attempts to provide information to families and to encourage them to participate in their child’s learning. This strategy simply involves families in education in some way. The “unintended consequence” of this approach can be that parents are seen basically as helpers who follow the teacher’s directions. They are not seen as valuable partners in their child’s education.

Family engagement is a more holistic and intentional approach in which the responsibility for supporting the child’s learning falls on the parents, siblings, relatives, teachers, friends, and the community; all play a critical function in continuing and reciprocal engagement. Family engagement involves the teacher building relationships with families, learning from the families how they would prefer to be involved in their child’s learning, and working with families to understand and plan how they choose to be engaged. This would include desired times and methods for sharing information about the child’s experiences. Family engagement offers a broad variety of approaches and activities that can be offered at home, in the community, or in the classroom or program.

In the pursuit of quality in our work, we strive for intentional family engagement. While doing this work, it is important to consider family-sensitive environments. The concept of being family sensitiverelationship implies that the teachers, providers, and other early learning professionals will exhibit positive and respectful attitudes towards families. Knowledge about each individual family, their strengths, the experiences in their lives, and the values and beliefs that influence their decisions, along with responsive practices with families, are the foundation for supporting and building positive parent and child outcomes. Included within this context is a specific focus on supporting families by acting as a resource to empower them to promote their child(ren)’s healthy development. These relationships with families also focus on reciprocal information sharing and empowerment of families by building mutual respect.

Appreciating what families bring to the program is a significant construct of family engagement. Because families are the experts on their children, each parent/family has specific expertise to contribute. Parents know how a child interacts with others and how the child responds to new people and situations. Parents know what a child is interested in and likes to play with. Parents also know about and can share how a child expresses his or her wants and needs. Families also bring to the program their individual pride in raising their children along with an understanding of the challenges that are inherent in the job of parenting. Parents come into a program with their own specific needs for support and information. An important element of our relationship-building process with families is to identify and build upon the strengths of the individuals involved. This will demonstrate respect, show appreciation, and value for the contributions of the family in support of the child.

Equity We talked early in the chapter about stressors families face. Equity and equality are also considered stressors that we need to understand and consider as we engage in our work with families. Did you know that equality and equity have different definitions and meanings? It is important to understand the differences as we engage in our work with children and families (Ferlazzo, 2023). Embracing equity means that we engage in fair and impartial approaches to disregard privilege, oppression, inequalities, and disadvantage. Equity is not equal or one-size-fits-all. Equity is working with each child and family to individualize and differentiate strengths and areas for growth to create a plan that gives each what is needed to grow and thrive. In this intentional and meaningful engagement, equity-based opportunities can also serve to help family members to be effective advocates for their child(ren). In considering equity in your approach, remember translation and interpretation, work with cultural groups as partners, and recognize the importance of building (and even rebuilding) trust with families who face discrimination and bias. For family engagement to be meaningful, it must be equitable. On the other hand, equality IS one-size-fits-all. It is equal and gives everyone the same thing. While seemingly well-meaning, equality misses the mark in meeting the individual and unique needs of children and/or their families. To assist in your understanding of the difference between equality and equity, you are encouraged to reflect on the following image: The first panel shows three individuals, each standing on the same size (equal) boxes and reaching for fruit on the tree branch. In this image, all 3 have the same size box, but not all individuals can reach the fruit. In the second panel (equity), each individual is provided with the size box they require to reach the fruit. We need to remember the importance of (equity) in providing all of our services to children and families so that they can get what they need in order to thrive and succeed! Let’s apply that concept of (equity) specifically for an ECE program Family-teacher conferences and family events are common strategies for engaging families in classrooms and programs. We need to remember that the main and essential factor in family engagement is to build strong, positive, and effective relationships with families that can help children and families thrive. Family-teacher conferences also support the first NAEYC principle of family engagement: “Programs invite families to participate in decision making and goal setting for their child” (NAEYC, n.d., para. 4). These planned and intentional times to meet are opportunities to share information about the child’s experiences, development, and learning. It is also the time to plan what can be done at home and at school to support the child’s continuing progress. Going a step further is the concept of justice. Justice is not just about meeting requirements. It demands proactive and transformative measures to create equitable structures and systems that sustain justice. Only by taking these steps can we ensure fairness and equality for all. Taking that step towards justice begins to address systemic attitudes and changes. Reflection Think about creatingequitable opportunities for family engagement in your program or classroom: How will you begin to create a meaningful engagement and communication plan to support the children and their families that you serve? How will you respond to families equitably? What do you need to know and consider to engage families fully in their child’s education? Overcoming Conflicts [block]“You and I are in a relationship which I value and want to keep. Yet each of us is a separate person with our own unique values and needs and the right to meet those needs. So that we will better know and understand what each of us values and needs, let us always be open and honest in our communication.” Thomas Gordon, an American philosopher and psychologist, 1964/1978 (as cited in Adams, 2021, para. 6) [/block] When it comes to children, there are no two parties more invested than parents and teachers. Unfortunately, these emotions can cause tensions to run high when there are many sources of potential conflict in the school setting. Regardless of your good intentions and how carefully you plan, conflicts might arise as you and the families you serve work to build relationships and create your communication plans and strategies. Most commonly, conflicts are the result of a lack of understanding of one (or all) of the following: background, culture, language, and/or beliefs (Mosier & Nunamaker, 2019). When conflicts arise, we need to remember two general goals: End the disagreement. Preserve the relationship. Regardless of your goal, good communication will be a key strategy and is the best approach for a positive outcome. Following the conflict resolution, it will be important for you and possibly your team at the program or center to meet and review policies, rules, and assumptions that have been in place. Discuss program expectations for families with your administrator and other staff, be open to assessing what is necessary, what is in place because “it’s how we’ve always done it,” what is a preferred practice or approach, and what is your own personal taste. Reflection Jani’s parents send you an email to say they will not attend the conference on Thursday because they are unable to attend every school event or volunteer for every activity. They further state that it is the job of the teacher (you) to teach Jani. What is your solution/response? Do you need resources or support? Who will you ask? When rules and expectations are kept realistic, and to a minimum, the opportunity for conflict is also minimized. This will lead to a more collaborative environment and allow for communication that improves and increasesfamily engagement. Stay positive and remember that reciprocal relationships are more likely to involve the co-creation of a mutually healthy vs. those in which one role tries to set the framework with extensive rules and consequences and expects the other to go along with their plan. For example, consider involving your families in developing or updating policies. This will show families that you respect them and appreciate their presence, as well as convey a sense of respect and belonging. This also will most likely encourage more acceptance of the policies and expectations that have been developed together. Reflection Think about a community activity that you have been involved in and enjoyed. What prompted you to participate? How can you apply this insight to your work and create family engagement options?

Attributions

1. Figure 9.4: image released under the Pexels License
2. Figure 9.5: image released under the Unsplash License
3. Figure 9.6: Digital Equity in India by Nisha0909 is released under CC BY-SA 4.0
4. Figure 9.7: Equity vs Equality by MPCA Photos is released under CC BY-NC 2.0
5. Figure 9.8: Children’s House © Minor Avenue Fair use: screenshot excerpt referring to full report: “Children’s House”.