Thoughts and Perspectives on My Identity

“What is your identity?” This question might be difficult to answer quickly for some people like me.  Of course, I know the word identity, but I’ve never thought about it deeply before I had this essay assignment. Then, I realized that most of it comes from my childhood, especially my family, and there are both identities that I can’t change and might be able to change. I like both identities and have some dreams to move forward. My identity as a Japanese woman is a little different from typical of Japanese society, because my parents traveled many places, especially my father, and were well-cultured in a small community that rarely considered leaving their hometown, so I had the benefit of diverse thinking.

I was born and grew up in Japan, and my hometown is Hachinohe City, Aomori prefecture where is the north part of Japan. I lived there with my mother, father, an older brother, and a younger sister until I went to college. I was an obedient and introverted child in my early time because my parents were busy as both civil servants, especially my father was a Self-Defense Forces and sometime lived separately with us due to his task. I remember that I thought I should not cause trouble, and that might have affected my character. Though my mother had to take care of us only by herself most of the time, she was a strong woman. (She is strong now, too.) She worked a full-time job and had pride in her job as a dental hygienist. She always said, “You must become an expert of something”. My father said the same thing because he had a hard time. He was an adopted child and went to high school with his own money while working. He didn’t want me having the same difficulties. They always gave me the opportunities to think and experience that so I can increase my knowledge, and that statement made me think about my career deeper.

Still now, the statement makes me consider my career in the U.S. Also, they taught me that there were various cultures in the world. As I wrote before, my father was in the Self-Defense Forces, and he was in the Marine. So, he had many opportunities to visit to foreign countries including the U.S. He told me what happened there, and it was completely different from Japan such as Venice canals and American limousines. He also gave me many souvenirs from different countries. The souvenir that I strongly remembered was Hawaiian chocolate, the famous macadamia chocolate. The taste was the sweetest I had ever eaten, and I drank milk a lot. I couldn’t imagine there was so sweet chocolate in the world. He brought back Indian and Sri Lankan tea too, and we sometime had teatime. I don’t remember which one is which and how, but those tastes were very different though both were just black tea. Through these experiences, I learnt about cultural diversity naturally, and I was easy to adjust here when I moved here.

I made my career steadily in Japan, but after I got married, I had to move here because of my husband’s job. While living in Japan, I was of course in majority of society and rarely feeling difficulty or discrimination. However, after I move to the U.S., I became the minority of society as an Asian immigrant. My identities about race: colored, ethnicity: Asian, gender: female, and nationality: Japanese can’t change, but fortunately, I have never had discrimination cause of those identities. People who live in the East side area appreciate diversity. I think because of it comes from that there are many tech companies. I know that people of many races/ethnicities are working together and have opportunities to train diversity in these companies through my husband. Some of my identity give me benefits, like my immigrant status; I’m a permanent resident, so I can enter the U.S. easier than other immigrants. However, there are also disadvantages in my identity such as language. English is the most making me in trouble thing here, and the recent trouble was entering this class. First, the classes that I would take were cancelled, but I didn’t know it before I asked that they disappeared from CTC link to the registration office. And then, I tried to enroll in this class, and it was already a waiting list. Then, I applied for late enrollment, but it wasn’t reflected until last week. I thought many times that if I were an English native, it would be easier. As written above, I have both benefits and difficulties as an immigrant, and I’m neither more nor less dominant group. I’m basically placed in middle range of the wheel, and some statements are placed in power or marginalization.

I feel I’m lucky even though some of my identity statements are placed in marginalization, because I don’t have critical issues or discrimination. I also have some opportunities to change some of my identity factors, like that I entered this college to study architecture and improve my career.  I might face strong marginalization someday or someplace, but I will be able to control my emotions and handle the situation because I believe that my identity is my own and wonderful even though I’m not a typical Japanese woman. I think the importance of identity is having pride and self-affirmation. I’m thankful to my parents who raised me like this.